In this email I’m going to share the 2 qualities that determine whether a man will be open to a serious relationship with you or not.
These are the 2 qualities men are UNCONSCIOUSLY WORRYING ABOUT and looking for in you from day one.
Keep reading to find out what these 2 qualities are.
Do you know why a man will share amazing times with you… then tell you he’s not ready for a “serious” relationship and pull away?
And how about when a man tells you he isn’t “ready” and then he ends up committing to the very next woman he meets?
The secret to being “the one” in the right man’s mind isn’t about catching him at that rare special moment where he’s consciously thinking “commitment” and insisting on it.
The secret is doing just a few of the right things that will help him RECOGNIZE YOU as the right woman from the very start.
Find out how to have your man feeling so excited and inspired with you that he’ll forget all about his old commitment fears and throw his “freedom” out the window just to be with you.
To know exactly how to have a man move from feeling ok with “dating” and hanging out once in a while… to him feeling wild with excitement and desire for more in your relationship, you need to check out my eBook “Catch Him & Keep Him”.
Don’t miss out on the relationship you could have with a great guy because you falsely believe you should know everything about men and dating just because you’re a woman.
Most women simply never found out what really works with a man. But I’ve shared the real story.
In Chapter 7 of my eBook I explain exactly what attracts a man for more than just a few dates, and how to have him begging you to be with him.
Be sure to read the sections on “The Natural Way To Attract A Man” (page 189), as well as how to avoid the attraction-killer of a man seeing you as “Needy & Insecure“. (page 221)
Discover these secrets and enjoy the feeling that comes from your man doing his all to keep you both happy and together.
Download my eBook here and get on the right track:
Let’s get down to the good stuff.
Did you know that for lots of women it’s EASY to meet some random new guy to have fun with…
But HARD to find a real man who is not only attractive, but ready for a real and COMMITTED relationship?
But of course you already knew that.
You’re a woman.
But do you know how MEN think when it comes to dating?
And WHY a man will choose one woman for a relationship instead of another he also had a great time with?
Do you know what makes a woman “Relationship Material” in a man’s mind?
And do you know why a man can date a woman for weeks or months and really enjoy being with her, but never want more with this woman?
If you’re not completely clear on what it is that will have a man choosing to be with you and fight for your relationship, even when things are tough, then it’s time you found out.
Let me start by clearing something up…
Lately it’s all the rage to talk about how men and women are different.
Science has found some fascinating things out in the last 3 to 4 years. Brain chemistry, brain region size differences, etc.
But the fact of the matter is… no one is really getting to the bottom of how these things actually play out in the real world.
As they play out in RELATIONSHIPS.
Let me shed some light on the subject.
Here’s something about men you should know-
You know how some women hate dating? And how they dread the idea of going out with some random guy they hardly know?
Well, for most men it’s different.
Especially the kind of man who’s single, successful, and attractive. (The kind of men who are actually a “catch”)
Most men like this LOVE meeting new women…and they have lots of fun dating and getting to know new women.
Most importantly, they are NOT IN A HURRY to find a relationship and settle down or get married.
In fact, these kind of men often enjoy “dating” simply because they like the company of a woman in the present moment.
Put short, many of these men are dating just for dating’s sake.
There’s no specific intention or purpose behind meeting a woman and spending time with her, other than enjoying the time they spend together.
Now… is this how it is for you? And for most other women?
Things are different for most women.
I believe that most women who are dating are NOT dating just for dating’s sake.
Most women who are single and dating, or thinking about dating, have a clear goal in mind-
Finding a loving and monogamous relationship.
This more obvious stuff isn’t rocket science yet.
But here’s where it gets tricky and fascinating…
How do these differences in single men and single women have them thinking, feeling and acting with each other?
If you haven’t guessed it, or experienced a lot of it for yourself… it makes men and women feel like the other one just doesn’t “get it”.
How many men do you know who just don’t get it when it comes to love and relationships?
Right- most of them. (haha)
But guess what?
Most single men feel THE EXACT SAME WAY.
Most single men out there feel completely misunderstood by the women they meet and date.
So much so in fact, that many men doubt if there really is the kind of woman out there who they could ever enjoy being with.
And what a tragedy-
Tons of amazing single women who don’t feel like there are any men who “get it”.
And tons of great single men who have become convinced that there aren’t any women out there they could relate to.
Do you see how men and women could so often end up misunderstanding each other?
Men, as they are dating and living just for the “now”… can end up feeling pressured by a woman…
Meanwhile the woman can’t understand why he isn’t thinking and moving towards a more serious relationship after several great dates.
And on the other hand…
Women, as they are dating and looking at what could be in the future once they connect with a man…. can end up feeling unappreciated or rejected by a man who isn’t thinking “commitment”.
Meanwhile the man can’t understand why she is in such a hurry to put definitions and names to what they’ve just started sharing.
You’re probably starting to see the kind of CONFLICT and MISUNDERSTANDING.
By the way, for some quick insights and tips for attracting the right man from the very first meeting, or on the first few dates… I’ve put together a great resource that could change your single life forever.
It’s a guide I’ve put together that will show you how to quickly let the right man know you’re the one for him.
My very best tips for making a man fall for you on the first few dates is here:
Now – since we’ve covered some of the important things you needed to know about first…
It’s time I shared with you what those 2 qualities are that every man is looking out for and worrying about when it comes to dating a woman and whether or not she’s the right woman for him.
Attractive Quality A Man Wants #1) “Emotional Maturity”
Let me state a plain and simple fact that you might not fully get, but could change the way you see men and relationships.
Most men don’t understand the feelings that women have.
They don’t understand what the feelings are.
And they don’t understand where they come from.
Think of it this way…
What’s the largest negative stereotype out there that men put on women?
The big awful one I hear is that lots of women are “crazy”.
I’ve heard men, especially less evolved and conscious men, say this all my life.
“Man, that girl was CRAZY. Good thing I found out before I got too involved!”
If I had a nickel for every time I heard a man say something like this…
It’s not nice that a man wouldn’t have more sensitivity and understanding for a woman, but it’s what often happens in reality.
A man thinking of a woman as “crazy” often simply comes from a man not understanding how and why a woman is having the painful feelings she’s experiencing.
So to him, it simply looks like she’s a wreck emotionally. And therefore he thinks she’s the kind of woman he would never want to get close to for fear of her freaking out and causing him more and more “drama” in his life.
What some don’t understand about women is that the purpose and beauty of connecting with someone and having a relationship isn’t just about how much fun you can have together…
But about the amazing experience that comes from becoming deeply attached.
And when there’s a “disconnect” of some kind, and the man hasn’t allowed himself to become deeply attached emotionally, but the woman has… it’s often impossible for a man to understand what a woman is feeling. And why she’s feeling it.
To him, it looks like that lame guy word-
To the woman, she can’t understand how he can be so uncaring and insensitive.
Who’s right here?
What’s important is something else entirely from who’s right.
What’s important, if you want to find an amazing partner and start a great relationship… is to learn to LOVE more CONSCIOUSLY. (Even if you are just dating)
Loving more consciously means allowing yourself to become emotionally attached and share your feelings openly – even if it feels
uncomfortable or painful because you don’t get exactly what you want.
I’ll explain a bit more.
When you’re focused not on how to get the relationship or the pay-off you want when you’re dating, but on how to be open to loving and NO MATTER WHAT comes your way… this is allows you to be free to whatever is.
A woman who has this attitude is not only extremely fun and attractive to a man…
But she’s also able to really roll with the punches and keep herself emotionally grounded and centered in a positive way no matter what happens.
When a man recognizes that a woman is both loving AND that she keeps her composure and can handle herself in a loving way even if she feels hurt or upset… there’s almost nothing that says “Girlfriend Material” than a woman like this.
Funny thing is…
This is an awful lot like what makes a man a great partner for a woman-
If he’s willing to stay open and listen and hear you regardless of how he might feel angry or hurt or disagree with what you are telling him.
>>> Question: How does all this about “Emotional Maturity” and LOVING work and play out when you’re dating?
I’ll start answering this here…
The biggest mistake women make when dating is what I call the “Instant Relationship”.
This is where you feel so great about the connection you have with a man that you start talking and acting as though you and he are in a committed relationship.
Even though you’re still just “dating” in his mind.
When a woman starts talking about “how great their relationship will be”…
Or makes too many future plans with a man…
Or starts DEMANDING his time and attention in a way that only a woman who felt entitled to him
Or gets upset when a man acts in a way that shows they aren’t in a relationship, even though she’s acting like it…
It’s a HUGE TURN OFF to a man.
To a man, a woman treating a man as though they are in a committed relationship before they’ve actually discussed it and both agreed can be as unattractive and off-putting to a man as it is for a man to feel entitled to have sex with a woman just because they got together for a date.
It’s really that bad for a man.
Reason being, when a woman seems too eager to rush into a relationship, or seems to really “need” a relationship to feel comfortable and satisfied… it sets of red flags in a man’s mind.
He will believe that you must really want a relationship with him too soon before it’s time because you don’t have anything better in your life.
And on a deeper level, it also makes a man worry that since you are in a rush to get into a relationship – you must be unhappy in your own life.
Translation- “NEEDY” and hard to please.
And nothing makes a man think “RUN!” faster than a woman who seems like she’s impossible to please… and desperately wants him to please her.
*Hint- men LOVE to make the women they are with happy. So the easier it is to do so, and the more obvious it is that a woman is happy and emotionally healthy, the more comfortable a man will feel getting closer and more deeply involved with a woman.
If you realize that you often lose your composure emotionally with a man when things don’t go your way…
And you find yourself fighting, yelling, or arguing all the time and feel out of control while you’re doing it, then it’s a sign that you’re not holding yourself together in the right way.
It’s time you cared for yourself first, and put yourself in the right place in your own heart and mind before you try and focus on making your relationships work.
The good news is that it’s easy to start to get back in line with yourself emotionally.
And the second you do, you’ll find that there’s an instant “shift” in your relationship because YOU are in a different place inside.
Take the easiest path if you’re looking to break the patterns of hurtful relationships where you find you become emotionally out of control in a way that only hurts you and your relationship.
Make a shift in your life now and go check out the amazing program I’ve put together to help you with all this.
It’s called “Ready For Love”, and I strongly suggest you discover what’s in this program, and inside you, if you’re really ready for a change.
Become truly ready for love here:
Attractive Quality A Man Wants #2) A Woman Who Supports His “Freedom”
Do you know the single most important thing to a man that he fears losing in a committed relationship with a woman?
It’s his “freedom”.
But what does that mean?
For a man, it’s essential that he feels like he can do what he wants, and that no one limits or restricts him.
This goes for all areas of his life-
- His friends
- His free time
- His work
- His travels
- His interests
- The list goes on
So what happens when a great woman shows up he really starts to fall for…
But then she accidentally makes him feel like he’s limiting or restricting his life in some way with their relationship?
You guessed it-
He pulls away from the relationship in order to gain back his freedom.
And he doesn’t give you any reason for doing so whatsoever.
And the harder you try and get him to tell you what’s going on and explain things… the more he’ll feel you’re trying to limit or control him.
Even if you aren’t.
So what do you do in this situation?
I want to give you one of the very best tools you can have for understanding what’s going on with your man when it comes to these situations.
Use this whenever you’re in doubt about how your man is feeling, or you’re wondering why the man you recently met doesn’t seem to be warming to the idea of a relationship with you- even though you have a great connection.
Here’s the tool-
Part 1: Consider His Most Basic Question
If you want to relate to a man, you have to start to understand what he’s thinking and feeling with you.
There’s one basic question that every single man asks himself when he meets a woman and gets close to her.
The strange part is… it’s not a question he asks himself CONSCIOUSLY.
It’s a question every man is thinking on an UNCONSCIOUS LEVEL when he’s confronted with a new relationship with a woman.
>>>HIS MOST ESSENTIAL RELATIONSHIP QUESTION
Here’s a man’s most basic question when it comes to a relationship with a woman-
“Does this woman ADD to my life and make it more fun and free?”
“Does she and our relationship TAKE AWAY from my life and the things I like to do the most?”
Take a minute and think about this question.
Ok. Now let me show you how this works.
One thing lots of women mistakenly do is ask a man to STOP doing certain activities he used to do when he was single.
Things like taking weekend trips with his friends.
Or things like keeping the real friends he’s had in his life.
You get the idea.
Here’s the deal…
When a man feels that he has to give up the things he likes in his life to be with you, it is often a recipe for disaster.
Eventually, even if a man is intensely attracted to you, he will miss his own life and want it back.
If your relationship stands in the way of the life and the things he enjoys most, then watch out.
Your man will grow restless, stop feeling excited by being with you, and want a change but not know how to make it other than withdrawing from you.
Of course, most women don’t meet a man and come in between the other things he likes to do most in his life.
Women don’t intentionally do this, or say things like, “Hey let’s be together. Now stop doing this, this, and that because I don’t want you to.”
No. Instead it’s much more subtle.
Part 2: Answer His Most Basic Question
There’s an easy way to avoid all the worrying and trouble on making a man feel restricted by being with you.
And it’s by ASKING YOURSELF the most basic question a man has about you.
To ask your yourself this question…
“Does he feel like I add to his life and his freedom?”
“Or does he feel like I restrict him and take away?”
The simple act of being conscious of this question can have an amazing impact on the way which a man feels with you.
(To let you know, there’s a similar question that men should ask themselves with a woman. And it’s “Does she feel APPRECIATED and LOVED by me in the way I am in our relationship? Or does she feel unseen and taken for granted?”)
If you’re dating and you don’t know where things are going…
Or if you’re in a relationship and you’re not sure where you stand with your man, but you’d like to jump-start things and take it to the next level together…
I’ve got some great news-
A while back I did an amazing Seminar for about 75 women that was all about how a man thinks about commitment, and why he either becomes MORE RESISTANT to growth in your relationship as time goes on…
Or why he leads you continually into a more loving and evolving relationship.
(By the way, the difference as to why a man will be one way or the other with a woman will surprise you.)
Anyhow… this live event was a huge success.
And I don’t mean a success in my terms, but for the women who it actually helped with their relationships.
These women all said that they came away with a conscious understanding of what was REALLY going on in their relationship… and why they hadn’t broken through to that more loving place where they could deepen their commitment with their man on a physical, emotional, and mental level.
This seminar was such a success for these women that I decided to make it into an entire program for other women to use and work from at home.
Long story short, I recorded this Seminar and now you can get your hands on it either on CD or the full video on DVD.
It’s called “From Casual To Committed”, and it’s one of the programs that has received the most success stories and emails from women who it’s helped over the years.
Several thousand women must know something, and I think you should take a look.
You can even see real video clips of some of the women who attended this special program in person and see what they have to say about it.
Don’t stay stuck in your love life, or in your relationship because you simply didn’t know how all the things you know for yourself work for the man in your life.
Commitment is about different things for aman. And if you try and move forward in your relationship with a man for the reasons that inspire YOU… it’s likely to just create more RESISTANCE and make him WITHDRAW from you.
It’s time you had a relationship that went the distance, and gave you the deep level of comfort and confidence that only comes from having a man who’s also truly committed to you and your relationship.
Go here for all the details and get my “From Casual To Committed” program sent to you right now:
I’ll talk to you again soon, and best of luck in Life and Love.
P.S. If you’d like to learn the critical skill of knowing how to make a man feel ATTRACTION for you… and you’d like to quickly move past the purely physical reasons a man might want to be with you and also have him feel an intense “Emotional Attraction” for you…
My “Natural & Lasting Attraction” CD/DVD program is a great way to discover what it is that makes a man feel that intense “I have to be with her and have her” feeling inside.
It’s hard to describe this program in a few sentences, so go read about it here, and watch the preview video clips: