Comments on: Why A Man’s Attraction Fades, And How To Keep It

By: Danie

Danie — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 23:12:53 +0000

Is there anyone who had read the books and also UNDERSTANDS the points being made? If there is anyone out there who falls into that category and would enjoy making an outline or rather, wouldnt mind putting it in plain(non-persuasive) writing, that is exactly what I need! I have read many of the free articles. I feel like I just never get to the point. I’ve even tried outlining it myself! I do not have the money for the books, but the promises he makes are SO APPEALING. I had my heart shattered last year and what I was reading in those articles about what women do wrong sounded like he was describing me. How one day everything was just different. Every time I date someone since last year, it seems I sabotage the whole thing all over again. I’m reaching a point of desperation and although my gut is telling me that these books are not going to “fix” me, I am just looking for some type of guidance. I was posting this in hopes that maybe some reader has some advice or enjoys giving advice to someone like me or sharing what they have learned. Please contact me via email at morale83@aim.com Thanks and good luck to all of you!

By: Reese

Reese — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 05:40:59 +0000

So basically the longer I make a guy wait to have sex, the more of a chance I will have keeping him? And why is it that guys will look at you but won’t approach you, then if you approach them you seem desperate? I’ve dated a few guys who told me that If I hadn’t approached them, then they would not have came up to me because they were intimidated or shy. I get told I’m really pretty a lot, but yet I’ve been sinlge for 2 years. Guys all go running in the opposite direction. I know what I want out of life and I’m going for it, and I’m not easy. so, what’s the deal?

By: Roberta

Roberta — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 21:41:28 +0000

As a 60 year old widow who thought she would never love again after 36 years of marriage, I am amazed to realize that there are some good men out there and I had three of them pursuing me. I recently made the choice to spend the rest of my life with one very special man. I think what the really good, single men my age are looking for is a good friend, an attractive, sexual woman, honesty, humour, and someone who is not desperate. It is a smart thing to get a little close with a special man and then back off. Real men like the chase and it is better for a woman’s self esteem to have him chase you. That way he knows you are a woman with value and not a desperate person who makes the moves all the time. If he does not chase you, then just move on and do not humiliate yourself.
I have not read this book so I cannot comment.

By: Angel

Angel — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 14:05:24 +0000

I just wanted to post to thank Julie and the man who wrote about his wife’s beautiful soul – yes love, maturity, and spirituality sound like the basis of a very strong, loving, and nurtuting foundation. I happen to love Christian Carter – though sometimes when I listen to his cds I get turned off because he can come across as condescending to women who don’t “get it” – hey, who knows maybe that’s my stuff and not his – but he has some great points and some really amazing guests whom he interviews (Arielle Ford, Dr. Paul, Dr. Amir, and Marie Forleo were some of my faves – the kinds of meesages that you lsiten to that change your life). Julie, I kind of thought that to tell a man all of that before you even have your first date might be overkill, but if your friends have experienced success, maybe it’s something to consider. I definitely agree about setting the tone from the beginning (beginning with the end in mind) and I absolutely loved your question – toy or treasure? Regardless of what steps are taken exactly, it would be a good idea for women (and men who are looking to be treasured) to let these questions guide them to get to where they want to get. I would love to wait until marriage to have sex in theory – everything Julie said made such perfect sense! However I do not want to be married to man with whom I am not sexually compatible so I will tweak that for myself and save that act of intimacy – not for marriage but definitely not before I am being treated the way I want to be treated on a consistent basis and when I feel like he not only is making the effort to get to know me, but actually does and vice versa. I think most of the relationship books have a point (the rules get such a bad rap!! some ppl need those bc they just give themselves away at the drop of a dime!) but the bottom line is not to follow anyone’s rules. Use the info out there as a guideline and start making yur own rules and most importanly listen to you heart! I have been reading emails from Rori Raye and she has really led me on a path of emotional honesty that I can’t thank her enough for. Thanks everyone for sharing and I wish you all the best in love & life! To the women who posted their negative feelings about men …I know it is frustrating. To put your hearts out there time and again only to be lied to and not cherished. It’s enough to make you turn gay (Or hetero, whichever the case may be)! Lol. Just trust in the abundance of the universe and use this time to try to give yourself whatever it is you want from a man. For me it was nurturing. I am so nurturing and I wanted someone to nurture me for a change! Long story short, I learned to nurture myself. I take leisurely baths with special salts and light candles..go to the spa, work out at the gym- whatever makes me feel taken care of – and u know what? Eventually you won’t need so much from another person bc you will be giving it to urself. Of course you’ll still have needs from your relstionships but they won’t be so overwhelming for the other person or unhealthy for u. It’s easy to turn to hate and blame but that won’t change the problem. The hardest thing for me was to see failed relationships as a blessing. With each failed date or relationship you truly do have the opportunity to see where the holes are inside and to patch them up – it can be from ‘why do I continue to choose the wrong guy’ or ‘why do i jump in emotionally before I have tested this guy’s character?’ or ‘What am I doing to contribute to things not working out?’ This is about you and your life! not some relationship. Trust me (I know, lol), but seriously – once you start to answer these questions for yourself and that lightbulb clicks for you, you will attract the right kind of energy into your life. Just ask the universe to open your heart and be ready for it … it’s amazing what you get when you ask for it! I am so sorry for the book!! Hopefully someone got something out of it though. And now I mean it – take care everyone and thanks for sharing! I appreciate it :)

By: Laura

Laura — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 06:13:07 +0000

I loved what Julie wrote. Thank you!

And about Christian Carter: I agree with everyone that his stuff is wordy. He doesn’t use paragraphs. It infuriated me to read it, too. But I’ve been listening to his CDs for a while now. At first I was put off, because some of the women that he interviewed were so Valley Girl. But I have to say that I’ve learned a GREAT DEAL in the last two years. I listen to the CDs in my car, then I read the books that are suggested, and I go go the websites of the people he interviews, and I read their books, too, and listen to their CDs.

I will get out there soon and find my treasure of a man, and I will feel like I’m prepared. Thank you, Christian.

By: Jeremy

Jeremy — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 02:59:42 +0000

Wow, I would have to agree with Julie. I would say that she hit it right on.

By: Jeff

Jeff — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 17:09:52 +0000

My wife and I are frequently complemented by friends.

They admire the relationship and family we have built over 19 years. We are fit, happy and romantically in love. It isn’t luck. People can do this.

It takes Spirituality, Love and Maturity. If you nurture your Spirit and become fun, loving and attractive from the inside out, you become incredibly popular with others including your mate.

You also become content with your own company and not “needy”. You won’t be “played” because you aren’t the softy you were inside, you’ll come from strength for a change.

In a nutshell, you have tried outer things. You have bought the outfits, the cars, the hair style, the teeth whitening, but you don’t have (credit to Allan Bloom here) a “beautiful soul”.

Most people today cannot define a beautiful soul, but beautiful souls are sexy, powerful and attractive, even in denim cutoffs and without makeup.

By: Fred

Fred — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 23:48:46 +0000

Interesting debate,as a man I have to say that you have to be brave to give a woman your heart.Often some women are so damaged emotionally by their previous men that they are out for revenge on any man to hand.Knowing this makes men weary of getting involved emotionally as they seldom know how much bad kama they may have to work through with that woman to make it possible for her to believe that he wants her for the right reasons.

By: Julian

Julian — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 06:18:49 +0000

Hey there,

I’m a guy and I agree with most of what’s said here, if spoken in generalities. Most of us are twats to say the least, however I know there are at least some guys out there that don’t use their downstairs region to do all the thinking.

Don’t let the common generalised male destroy your outlook on life.

By: Paul

Paul — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 18:53:30 +0000